New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
