I think scott just propositioned me for sex
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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