We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize