HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Randomize
