What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
