Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
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