I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
