And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
