I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Randomize
