just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Sext me about skeletons
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