well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
