Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Randomize
