Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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