is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
