Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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