Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
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