These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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