I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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