the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Randomize