I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I don't think brook has ever known best
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize
