Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
You can't special order awesome
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I need water and some morals
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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