So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
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