beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
