HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize