Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
