i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
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Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
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