I must be too annoying 4 u.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
Randomize
