I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
I just gargled with NyQuil
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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