Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize