Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
