so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
