hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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