I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
