My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
