Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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