NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Randomize
