I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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