Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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