if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Randomize
