If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I can't turn off my feet"
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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