My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Randomize
