How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
