this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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