I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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