It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Randomize
