Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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