why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
