I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
