Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
