At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
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We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
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